My Belief in Human Kind

Anyone who has heard of the difficulties I’ve had in life, raped by my dad when I was 13, beaten repeatedly with a belt as punishment for what I had done, ran away from home at the age of 18, a long string of domestic violence relationships, multiple suicide attempts, time in a psychiatric ward and so on would think that I haven’t a whole lot to think positive about, especially with human kind.

But……I am today one of the happiest people I know, married to a wonderful man, matriarch of a large family including four children, fourteen grandchildren and thirteen great-grandchildren, a beautiful home on five acres of land near Sedona, AZ, many awesome friends, published author and the greatest little Shi Tzu in the world, Rocky.

Yet, I have moments when I think on the dark side of humanity and wonder if there will always be such a large amount of it. I had an experience a few days ago that skyrocketed me back into optimism.

I was very tired, having had a bit of trouble with sleep the night before but Rocky needed dog food and so I obediently drove to the local Wal-Mart. I bought my purchases, hauled my cart out to my car, loaded the goodies into my trunk, and shoved my cart away, too tired to haul it to the nearest cart holder. I wearily saw a gentleman grab my cart, give me a funny look (“funny” covers a wide variety of possibilities) then move in the opposite direction my cart in hand. I drove towards home and halfway there realized I had left my purse in the cart. No wonder said person gave me a funny look. Panic stricken I drove back to Wal-Mart, checked all the carts near where I had parked, then raced into Customer Service praying the entire time. Nope, no one had turned it in. I went back out to the parking lot and this time, thinking of my cell phone with all its numbers, photos, text messages etc. my checkbook, wallet, driver’s license, numerous credit cards, my beautiful new rosary, business cards for the Lamplighter Movement (I’m the Founder of an International Movement for Recovery from Incest and Childhood Sexual Abuse) and $40 cash, spiraled into a very depressed state of mind (despite having learned in recovery that the only thing that’s the end of the world is the end of the world – I’m not perfect). Accompanied by tears and prayers I combed the parking lot. Some lady stopped me and asked if she could help me with anything. I told her what had happened and she started helping me look. She looked in trash cans saying that maybe he’d grabbed any cash and thrown it away. But no, it was nowhere.

Sadly, still praying, still tearful I went home and began the calls. First to my bank who said they’d put a hold on any checks written but maintain the automatic deposits and told me to wait until Tuesday to take further action. Then I started calling credit card companies to cancel the cards. I called the Police Department to report the loss. After taking my information they said that Wal-Mart had video cameras on their parking lot and took the information about my car and where it had been parked (their video camera recorded the entire event including the man taking my cart with its purse). Then I called my son, a former LAPD Police Officer and tearfully told him my dilemma. Supportive and caring he told me not to worry about the cell phone as they stored all of my information on the Cloud. This made me feel better.

I was getting ready to cancel the last credit card when my husband, who had returned home from a photo shoot with a friend visiting from England while I was making the phone calls, came running upstairs to my Library saying, “Stop the presses! Don’t cancel any other cards.” He was holding my purse. The door bell had rang and when he answered it a couple handed me my purse and left abruptly with no explanation. Everything was still in tact including my cash.

Just when you think the world is a nasty place something happens to make you realize it has it’s moments of wonder.

Happy Memorial Day and a HUGE THANK YOU TO ALL THE VETERANS WHO HAVE PROTECTED OUR COUNTRY.  They too have provided “moments of wonder.”

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